I'll explain the worst case scenario, because I have some time and I'm on a train, so that time won't fill itself. Unlike the woman on the train I took to London, who was texting with keypad tones on on her phone, so it sounded like she was dialling a huge long number, I use my phone on silent, so nobody will get pissed off. Actually, I asked her if she was dialling a long number and she said that she was texting and asked if it was annoying. I said yes and she was put out. Then I asked if her phone didn't have a silent mode and she got more put out. She then told me that if it bothered me I could find one of the special quiet carriages, at which the person behind her suddenly exclaimed that we were in such a carriage. Cracking!
Anyway. The worst case gig scenario. It's not nobody. That's bad, but you don't do the performance, so it's not that bad. Playing to fewer than 4 is worse, though 4 is pretty bad. Playing to one is hardest as is 2 if they're a couple. It's worse if you know them personally, or at least off stage. It's worse if it's family. It's worse still if it's your mum or grandmother. So tonight wasn't actually the worst it could be for me, but the audience of one, who was one of our number's wife, was fairly tough.
I closed the show and doubled the audience when I brought this woman's husband from backstage to the seating area to join her. It was still far too intimate, but what the hey. I tried out some new stuff and messed around with some oldies. Call the whole thing a technical rehearsal. . . One I managed to fluff a little when I didn't personally check the others were ready to start before I started the show going. It made sense to me that the acts, backstage at the allotted time, with the audience seated, would be ready. . . Apparently not.