I had a weird feeling throughout yesterday. I know what that feeling is. It's change. The result of the decision to buy and develop a house for rental is starting to make itself feel altogether more real in my life. In order to make things happen I will have to make some changes. I think it will ultimately result in change for the better, though I think things will have to get a lot more difficult before we reach the end of the process. In some ways, buying this house, which I really like (and will be disappointed not to live in), is only a stepping stone towards owning a house that I'll live in long-term, but it will, at least, give me some sense of autonomy. I'm not suited to living in a large shared household... I mean, I'm sure my own children (who don't yet exist) would be welcome to share with me, but sharing a house in general isn't really me.

I need space.

However, something has to give, and it seems that the best solution is to push the pause button on the gigging for a bit. I don't know from when - the completion date on the house seems like a good idea, but we don't know when that is. However, if there's work to be done, then hanging around and not doing it is not the best of ideas. So, I will, at some point soon, be clearing my diary for a few months. I like gigging, and I'm frightened of the results of life without it, but I'm not quitting, just pausing.

Now I've written this, it will have to be true.

So, it was with mixed feelings that I went to last night's gig. I felt down at the fact that I'll miss gigging, and I felt more appreciative of the opportunity to perform to an audience. As a result, I dragged out a few items from "the vault" and had a good time. I even performed the song I never perform, simply because some people had come especially to hear it. Damn their requests... and damn my eagerness to please.

Last night was my 373rd gig. A friend of mine, who'd witnessed my 85th, came along and saw it. Thankfully she noticed quite a difference between the two. It was good to catch up. That's another of the good things about gigging, I suppose - it takes me around the country and makes me likely to run into random people, whom I've met through the myriad other random activities I'm involved in.

I met this friend through Crisis, with whom I'm spending this weekend doing training. There's a link.

Last night I was in Birmingham which is where a computer magazine, for whom I write, is based (or was based). I'm not sure. I do know that I spoke to the editor of that magazine today, and I'm fairly certain he's based in Birmingham. Following recent events and my write-up of them, they're fast tracking the article to print. It should be on paper and on sale in two weeks (or three at the most), which isn't bad at all, considering I only submitted the final draft a couple of days ago, and it has already been through the lawyers.

Very pleasing indeed.

And my weight was looking quite low last night, but I weigh myself too often, so it's hard to decide whether I was just fluctuating.