I don't seem to have time for normal day to day things like personal grooming or getting my laundry done at the moment. The diy is on a bit of a go slow too. I shall, hopefully make some proper time for it this week, but then this week's plans have gotten into a state of flux as a result of the immediacy of my comedy mission, which may well have me running round frantically for the next 8 months. We'll see. I don't know how to run my life if I'm honest. I cram everything in, but it can get taxing and often lonely too. That's the price I pay for the ego boost I seem to need from the performing I do.
I really like the whole process of making something and then sharing it with an audience. This is the satisfaction. There is additional satisfaction to be had when the creative process involves someone else. I last really had that pleasure back in the last days of The Musical!. Now it would seem that I am back into driving round with a keyboard in my car and with rehearsals and scripts running round my head. I have a gig tonight where we shall be performing two co-written songs to an audience. How they will react, I don't know. That's scary. The 'we' in question is me and another stand up comedian. She is good, and a good friend, but we have never faced an audience together. We have no idea where it will go. It should be fun though.
Meanwhile, on Saturday, I have my long term music and writing partner coming over to record some more music. He wants to talk about the possibility of doing another show in Edinburgh together. I thought that might mean I had two shows in Edinburgh this year to plan for. However, he is talking 2009! Amazing. So, it seems I have a large creative landscape ahead. Is that even a meaningful metaphor? Let's pretend it is.
So I have pleasant butterflies in my stomach. At some point in the next 9 hours or so, I will take to the stage with a new 8 minutes of material that is barely rehearsed and is just. . . Unknown. The fear and excitement of the unknown is very real. I like it. To make the pressure more palpable, there will be people we both know in the audience. That should up the stakes a bit. Nobody wants to look stupid in public, least of all in front of people they know. Still I've died on my arse in front of the girl I most fancied at that time and I survived. What's the worst that could happen tonight? Nothing big.
Every on stage experience makes you stronger. Bad ones are inuring and good ones increase your confidence. That said, I do have a bit of a sweat on thinking this evening through. It will be fine. I'm sure it will. Plus, if tonight goes well and if luck is on our side, there is the possibility of a gig doing more of the same on the Isle of Wight on Friday. All of this is really just the starter. Our session on Friday night, where we improvised our way through some interesting ideas, generated something which I think is absolutely hilarious. I'd like to try performing that sometime, so I hope we get some momentum up from this week. I like this creative stage. This year has promise already.
Meanwhile, having had a busy weekend with late nights, drinks, junk food, rehearsing and miles in the car, I'm exhausted already!
Note: this was the 2008th ever post... posted in 2008... what are the chances!?