From: "Katya M" [with apparently my email address]
To: [firstname.lastname@example.org], [email@example.com]
Date: Thu 02/12/10 12:18 AM
Ave, my friend!
I am a sporty, intelligent girl, kind, honest, interesting,
communicative, easy-going and open-minded young lady
I have a lot of friends, they say that I am very decent and
devoted person, understanding and interesting interlocutor. Moreover
I’m a mysterious girl with deep beautiful eyes. To tell you the truth,
sometimes I think that I’m hopeless romantic and try not to loose the
hope to find my dream… but after that, backing to the reality I understand,
that all these just dreams and I should get rid of these ideas, but
just can’t… I want to find a person who can understand, respect and think
much of me. In general I consider that the main thing is mutual
Here's a reply I couldn't send, since she was claiming to have my email address as hers
I'm glad to hear you're sporty and intelligent. When I first read that I thought it said you were spotty and intelligent. I know that pain. Sometimes the geek gene gives intellect, but doesn't have space to offer clear skin. In your case, you've got the brains, but you're using them to move yourself around a sports field. This might make you a nasty joke, the scourge of the geek, but you're also kind, honest and interesting (modest too, perhaps?). I have no doubt that you're communicative, given the unsolicited nature of your email. To say you're easy-going and open-minded and then emphasise your number of friends and how they thing you're decent and devoted and understanding and interesting... well, I think it disproves the easy-going thing. You seem a bit intense.
What the hell's an interlocutor? It sounds scary. Does it involve rubber hoses and electrodes? Then you're mysterious on top of it? Do I look like Peter Andre? You're starting to scare me. You claim to be a hopeless romantic, but your technique suggests you're more of a ruthless interrogator.
Anyway, backing to the reality (backing to the life), I don't give too hoots where you get rid of your dreams or not. I'm not a person who can respect and think much of you - you've made me frightened. As for understanding you. No chance. I've no idea what you're on about.
I hope you find love, or at least help... and if you're me in a nightdress and a state of fugue, then I hope we both get help.
All the best