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Wednesday, May 14

Not an identity crisis

There's a hell of a lot going on in my life at the moment. Apart from the dire need to lose weight, pretty much all of it is good. A fair amount of it is also remarkably intensive and hard work. To be honest, when immersed in hard work, I also hit the calories instinctively, which is why the dieting is a pain. I don't mind the hard work, though... well, I don't mind the right kind of hard work - I'm an awful procrastinator when it comes to the wrong kind of hard work. I thought it might be worth taking stock of what this work is and why I've thrown myself into it so much.

Before I continue, it's worth warning the potential readers of this that this is a fairly self-indulgent "what I did on my summer holidays" kind of a write up, and is probably not of huge interest to read. All I can say is that if I had something more useful to say I'd definitely be saying it instead of this. I can only write about what's in my head.

As an aside of more value than my own thoughts, perhaps it's worth pointing out that the internet has pretty much shifted us away from this sort of "read it in deep detail" article and more towards the Buzzfeed or Upworthy type of rubbish which is mainly pictures, has few words of interest, and is usually advertised with a teaser headline which promises the world and fails to deliver. I should advertise my own thoughts thusly - A man thought his past in computer programming was behind him, what happened next will blow your mind, warm your heart and give you an instant mind-gasm. There. That's overpromised it enough.

As another aside, is it just me, or is Upworthy basically better described as "preaching-to-the-converted-worthy"? Dreadful. Anyway, on with my own turgid drivel.

I guess I already gave a clue in my digression. I'm doing more software development now than at any stage in the last 5 years or so. I have rapidly learned to make use of technologies that were previously either a mystery to me, or "some stuff that someone else did". I'm enjoying software developing thoroughly, though it drives me totally crazy. When I'm mid-development, all I can think of is the suite of problems I'm solving/am yet to solve. In my job the software development that I'm playing with feels like a distraction from things I should also be doing. It's a hard balance to strike. I'm succeeding at some of it and failing at some of it.

As a software developer I need to be told I'm a genius a lot.

I've also got a second job as a software developer - it's something I also do by night. The night job is teaching me tricks to use in the day job, and I'm bringing various bits of my experience and expertise to it too. It's been a very absorbing few months; I didn't expect it to be this big an undertaking.

In other development news, I'm also building a deck for the garden. We're past the point where I could reasonably get out of completing the project. The partially constructed deck is something of a hazard and my wife and daughter would probably like to go outside and play at some point in the near future. Again, the unresolved bits of this project weight on my mind while they're not done. It's going well, but there's loads more to do.

I'm also a father of a lovely daughter who is learning to put two words together, and of a baby that's still a work in progress - due out in September.

I'd quite like to do some cycling too!

It's a complex life. I am enjoying it though.


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