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Monday, February 23

A most odd experience. I'm back at home only 40 minutes into the last day of my 29-year-old-hood, despite having dropped over to Glasgow for the evening. The gig went well... it would have gone even better if the slightly clumsy me hadn't stumbled over a few words, accidentally delivered a half a sentence on auto-pilot before realising it was the wrong sentence and having to improvise it towards the right meaning, and smashed my head on a low beam while leaving the green room of The Stand in Glasgow. Despite all of these things, the audience reaction was to my liking and I enjoyed the gig. I left early (having seen the headliner before) and had a clear run home, hence my presence at the keyboard at a most reasonable hour, under the circumstances.

That's the last gig for the beard. I've shampooed below the level of my ears for the last time (for now at least)... which is a shame, because my beard gags get the most hearty and natural laughs, according to recent experience. Never mind!

The day has been a strange one. My clumsiness has been abundant - probably because I'm knackered - but I've managed to get through some important household tasks and I arrived in Glasgow - after a wee tour of the city, because my printed instructions were missing key words which scrolled off the right of the page - in plenty of time for the gig. I took a cappuccino in the Hogshead pub near The Stand and found, to my surprise and chagrin, the drink to contain a label from an item of Marks and Spencer clothing. Clearly some previous patron had removed the label and dropped it in the cup and then the dishwasher had failed to dislodge it. I couldn't even be bothered to complain - it did me no harm, once I'd removed it from my mouth.

On the up side, I wandered into the green room at the comedy club to say hello to the compere and suddenly discovered myself in the presence of a "himoff" - as in "oooh, that's him off the telly". It doesn't really matter who the chap was. The critical question is "did I make an arse of myself". In short, no. I did not make an arse of myself. We're all fighting the same fight, we comedians, and there's no points for going all star-struck. I think I was just impressed because I wasn't expecting it to be someone I recognised. Served me right for not associating this chap with his name, which I knew in advance. This may be the first time I've been introduced by someone who I have on a video cassette (albeit in a minor role). So, let's acknowledge it and move on.

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