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Friday, March 13

Back from the dead

I got an email today asking whether I had driven my car into a ditch. This was from a concerned friend who had noticed the absence of entries in my blog and even the lack of update to my gig list. It seems that my online presence can be missed and that some of what constitutes my actual existence in real life is judged on the basis of my apparent existence in cyberspace. All of this tells me that I should get back into the habit of writing on this blog, and since I’m on an aeroplane with nothing to do right now, I’ll do just that.

As always the explanation for the “radio silence” has been the totally ludicrous amount of stuff that has been happening. I will, as I sometimes do when I get into blog “catch up”, try to write some specific events up, backdating the entry to a point in time that makes sense. However, there are various things that I cannot quite pin down and I will list them here. Needless to say, life for me is a constantly changing sea, and I have been overfilling it even more than usual recently, leading to much stress, which in turn has lost me my will to stay thin (easy excuse), as well as a general sense of moving forwards in a good way.

In life, as in business, staying in the same place is akin to dying. I believe you have to fill your life with as much diversity and wealth of experience as you possibly can. Bizarrely, though we humans are adaptable to change, we’re also averse to it. Though we enjoy novelty, we seem to prefer the familiar. The brain is excited by change, but forms self-reinforcing pathways too. I’m not a neuroscientist; I’ve no idea if that’s nonsense. Indeed, I’m not a philosopher either, nor a wise man of any calibre. If you can, try to ignore everything I’ve just written.

So, it’s a good thing that my life has kept me away from my blog, but it’s also been hard going. Rewarding. But hard work.

I’m on this plane coming back from just under a whole week in Budapest. In the last few days I’ve been working with my Hungarian team. It’s been a blast. We’ve had highights, minor lowlights, and a general sense of normality to go with the process. It’s a plus to me that I can breeze into an office many hundreds of miles away from my world, sit down and do a day’s work with a team of people, recruited my me, working in a way that I partially influence. A plus. Some people would be impressed. I just take it for granted. It’s how my life works. I’ve no idea whether worthiness comes into the equation or not; I prefer not to know.

Tonight I will land, pick up a rental car, drive home, repack my case, drive to my girlfriend’s flat, stay the night and then get ready for a weekend which has me doing some work on her flat, us both going to see a London musical, and then going up north somewhere the following day for a big gathering of people. I’ll next see my home (after my minutes-long sojourn of tonight) on Monday night sometime, when I hope to pick up the task of getting it finished. Nearly there.

Diversity in life is good. I will admit that I can feel the pressure way too often. Bizarrely, though, the week in Budapest has relieved some of the pressure that preparing for it and also recovering from it has created.


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