I spent much of last year learning to do a Brian Blessed impersonation. His trademark exclamation of "Gordon's Alive" is quite a good phrase to use about me at this moment in time. I'm very much alive... despite the events of the last few hours. I've just returned from a gig that didn't go as well as many of my others, and a car journey that was, possibly one of my worst.
I had 4 opportunities to die on the roads this afternoon/evening. Firstly, I found myself heading quite quickly into the back of the car in front on the A1 as I drove South. This was because he had suddenly decided to brake - himself unaware of the traffic in front. Always know your exits... in this case, I braked and worked out where I could escape to - I found a nifty bit of road, called the inside lane (perhaps where all the slower cars should have been in the first place) and got into it before impact. We had feet to spare. That was fine.
Then a car decided to pull out into me. I was overtaking - he had a blind spot - the blind spot being the entire right hand side of his head as far as I could tell. I pulled to the right and hooted my non-sounding horn (should have asked them to fix that last week) and survived.
Then, after surviving the gig, I managed to pull of the A38 into a services with no idea of exactly how sharp the turn was. The braking and steering set about something of a skid situation. Luckily, my training and experience were adequate to keep the car from hitting anything. The adrenalin of the drive was, possibly, more pleasurable than the calmness that hits me when I'm on stage - where others get the adrenalin buzz of being under pressure. As I came to a halt, an advertising sign in front of me came into view it said "Splat". There was also another billboard in the window of the petrol station - it was advertising ice cream with the bizarre slogan "time to put on the brakes". Weird.
How I might look in a car at night
Help... preparation is underway, but I feel woefully unpreparated. Lots to do and I don't know when I'll be able to do it.
Hello to EW. There, a mention... and thanks for the company... perhaps texting while driving is also a little of a risk. Tonight I was invincible.